the catwalk
Ever tried putting a harness on a cat, or giving a cat a bath, or really even trying to get a cat to do anything it doesn’t want to do? The ears flare and flatten back, the eyes go wide in anger or terror and sometimes they even play dead. A good mental image is a feline howling for a mate…you’ve heard that…they get beside themselves and instinct kicks in. Perhaps you’ve discovered you beside yourself…after the loss of a loved one or in the midst of a tragedy or devastation. You might have an understanding of how that cat feels.
This week I began taking our shelter cat, Murphy for walks. My son and I had gone to the shelter to see if one of the animals there took a cotton to us. I wanted a dog…so I could start going for walks again and perhaps find some recovery in that. Then Murphy found us. He and my son, Chance, bonded almost immediately. Chance knew it, then I gave in, and we got the cat. But still wanting to walk, I decided to get a harness and leash to see if Murphy was willing to assist me in my journey.
At first he wasn’t going for it, although he is pretty good-natured for a cat. He begrudgingly let me put the harness on him, but then he rendered his body completely motionless…playing dead. Once we were able to get outside, all of the noise, commotion and new scents overwhelmed him. We had to stop every few feet and if a vehicle rumbled by the planet seemed to stop rotating altogether while we waited in utter angst for it to pass. I remember observing his reactions and realizing he was doing a good job expressing his anxiety… exactly as I was feeling it.
He would splay his legs and dig his heels in…. adopting the craziest stature and wildest eyes, as if he were falling from some tall precipice and the only way to stay balanced was to triangulate his posture and fluff up his tail… and there was no way anyone was going to get near him to hurt him. Survival is a strong motivator. This is exactly what anxiety feels like: survival mode. So Murphy and I crept along at a snail’s pace those first couple of times…even now sometimes it is more of a slow stroll than a walk.
He’s adapted and is getting used to the routine and I work around his greatest fear – vehicles, by taking him out early in the morning and late at night, when there are less cars…so he can enjoy the walk and want to continue with me. Not only am I able to get out of the house ‘alone’, I am able to be amongst the amazing energies of the earth and my community. We have been doing this twice a day for the last three days; three whole glorious days after years of not being able to go out for a walk alone without panicking (even if we are in survival mode). I have to admit: we did not rescue Murphy…Murphy is in the process of rescuing me. I think I shall go enjoy a cup of tea and sit beside myself to ponder while Murphy enjoys a snooze. I am able to do that today…life is good!
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You can find my creative expressions at Rootiebirds ~ Etheric Jewelry to Adorn Your Authentic Self
~ Oṃ śānti śānti śānti ~
Namaste~We.Are.One
Meanderings from a Bird on a Wire 